No excuses but I haven’t been in the pool for any practise since my last lesson so no update on that front but I thought I might write about something else today. Two things actually: embarrassment and support.
First up embarrassment.
I have been so embarrassed about not being able to swim that my friends didn’t even know it. I haven’t lied and said I can swim but because I wouldn’t outwardly avoid the water and it wasn’t something the people in my life did a heck of a lot anyway it didn’t really ever surface. If somebody was to ask me outright whether I could swim I would usually respond by saying “I am so weak that I would classify myself as not being able to swim” or “no not really”. But again, not a topic that came up often and not one I would bring up – for obvious reasons.
When I first started swimming lessons I kept it very much to myself – again very embarrassed to admit it. I found though that I wanted to share my experience and excitement at my progress with others so little by little I started to reveal to all my close friends and some of my work mates that I was taking swimming lessons (my family already knew).
I will be honest and say that 3 of these people laughed at me. Laughed. Yes. Laughed! The nerve of them!!! Especially given that one of them can’t swim herself. She was immediately chastised by her husband who was there at the time and thought it was great.
The second “laugher” (more of a chuckle really) subsequently retracted his laugh after being told how offended I was that he had laughed in response to my revealing something that was a pretty big deal to me.
The third laugher was also more of a chuckle really but by the time she chuckled I didn’t care anymore. I was proud of myself and that was enough for me. And when was the last time any of them had taken on such a challenge anyway??! :p
For the most part though people have been amazingly and fabulously supportive. They really really have. They have told me how impressed they are that I am taking on such a challenge and confronting such a long standing fear and some (more than I expected) have also owned up to not being able to swim themselves.
Some ask me without fail every week how my lesson was, some have come to the pool with me to practise, others read my blog (one of them, my sister, refuses to read my blog because she thinks it is nerdy….) and they all listen to my now constant chatter and philosophising about swimming, my lessons and the personal benefits I am reaping.
All of this has all been very helpful to me. It has kept my spirits and motivation high and helped me realise that (especially now that I am doing something about it) there is no need to feel embarrassed. I am certainly not the only one who can't swim and in fact recent statistics show that more and more children are becoming adults who can't swim A big thank you to all of them, to the people who have so helpfully responded to posts I have made on forums on this topic and also to the people who read this blog. I don’t know who you are but my blog stats tell me people are reading so I hope you are getting something back too. J
I might not be shouting it from the rooftops and while I still scan the swim centre before every lesson to check there is nobody I know around (refer to my post on Lesson #1 when I saw my boss’s husband and kids!) and I also still get a little embarrassed at my form when i am practising at the local pool, I am now more proud and excited that I am giving this a shot and taking on the challenge than I am embarrassed about not being able to swim.
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